I just have to share a few of these sillies. Even if you've already heard them, likely you'll dissolve into laughter again.
Kids In Church
3-year-old, Reese: "Our Father, Who does art in heaven, Harold is His name. Amen."
Jesus' Dad's Name
A Sunday school teacher asked her class, "What was Jesus' mother's name?" One child answered, "Mary." The teacher then asked, "Who knows what Jesus' father's name was?" A little kid said, "Verge." Confused, the teacher asked, "Where did you get that?" The kid said, "Well, you know they are always talking about Verge n' Mary.''
The Last Commandment
A Sunday school class was studying the Ten Commandments. They were ready to discuss the last one. The teacher asked if anyone could tell her what it was. Susie raised her hand, stood tall, and quoted, "Thou shall not take the covers off the neighbor's wife."
Deliver Us From Evil
I had been teaching my three-year old daughter, Caitlin, the Lord's Prayer for several evenings at bedtime, she would repeat after me the lines from the prayer. Finally, she decided to go solo. I listened with pride as she carefully enunciated each word right up to the end of the prayer: "Lead us not into temptation," she prayed, "but deliver us some E-mail.
and my favorite:
Forgive Us Our Trespasses
One particular four-year-old prayed,
"And forgive us our trash baskets as we forgive those who put trash in our baskets."
Wednesday, December 7, 2005
Monday, December 5, 2005
My funny for the day. I love roasted pumpkin seeds. I cleaned a whole big bowl full of seeds from the pumpkins Jack didn't take out to the deer. They were frozen solid by now, but he split them open yesterday and gave me the guts. I swished them around a lot under running water in the colander so the pulp separated and the job went easier than I was anticipating. I was really so pleased, things were going so well. But they are SO slippery, just like little fish. I spilled a bunch over into the sink which prolonged the job. But when that was remedied and I was nearing the end, I thought I was really getting somewhere when I got out my nifty salad spinner so I could have a leg up on the drying process. I'll tell you a whole big salad spinner full of pumpkin seeds can really spin. It was one of those before and after moments. I looked at Molly who was writing at the dining room table as I gave the spinner a last pump...I'm sure there was just really happy sparkle in my eyes, a job well done... She was watching me where I stood at the end of the peninsula where I had paper towels all ready and waiting for my seeds. And that was when I picked off the top of the salad spinner without stopping it first...that IS what that little black button is for, I know this, I just didn't think of it in the midst of all my happiness. Pumpkin seeds went FLYING ... no, flying is too tame a word, SPRAYing to the far-reaching corners of my kitchen and dining room. There was a split-second moment of horror and then we burst into laughter because it was hilariously funny. Thankfully, a lot of them landed on the peninsula and many of them ON the paper towels which I thought was rather wonderful. When I actually get them roasted, I hope they turn out good. Yum!