Tuesday, August 5, 2008

For One More Day

I just finished a sobbing fit...after reading anew what I wrote below.  I wonder if scrapbooking will often be like this, as I dig through old photos?  I miss my grandmother so much.  I wrote this a couple of years ago or more for one of Darylynn's homework assignments.  My grandmother passed away in 2000, just days before her birthday.  Here are some thoughts...

I would love to have one more day with my grandmother. I loved her dearly and miss her terribly. My life has never been the same since her passing. I would like to just sit with her awhile, share a cup of coffee and a good chat at the kitchen table like we used to, feel her papery hands again, lean into the warmth of her soft hug.

Grandma and my daughter, Molly

Grandma and my daughter, Molly

My grandma was widowed early on. My grandfather's plane crashed over the Himalayan Mountains in World War II. They would take Hi-octane fuel to Russia and bring back wounded soldiers. My mother was four and still has a vivid recollection of the early morning when they heard a knock at the door bringing news of his death. His body was never found. For whatever reason my grandma never remarried. She was very independent, and I remember her driving down from the city to our farm, always with presents for us kids, all six of us. She was a rock hound, loved to garden, and go fishing, and she would always want to go for nature walks with her grandchildren.

Gran fishing

Gran fishing

Gran picking raspberries and blueberries

Gran picking raspberries and blueberries

wayWhen I was older, I was staying overnight with her once and loringnoticed a big box of colorful thin paperbacks in her closet.  They were sweet, very old Harlequin Romance books. We shared them back and forth after that, and Emilie Loring books too. It was just a very fun thing to share with her.

My grandma was a bundle of energy as I grew up, a force to be reckoned with, but as she aged she became my "little gran." Before then, and before I got married, we took bus trips cross country which were a little hairy, a little scary, but true adventures. I can still remember rolling into those bus stations, getting off to stretch our legs and eat and then getting back on again, meeting people, seeing new places, making connections. We toured on foot through Washington, D.C., walked the shores of Myrtle Beach, dipped down into Florida, lunched beside the ocean at Biloxi, picnicked in the desert land of New Mexico, and sat in absolute awe at the edge of the Grand Canyon. Traveling with Gran was a trip. LOL But I have to tell you the most fun I had with her was sitting at her dining room table having coffee together.

Those were the days when she could still get around, still see okay. One of the last times I spent with grandma, I knelt in front of her wheel chair and buried myself into her front, soaking in the feeling because I knew it wouldn't happen many more times and told her how much I loved her. The end years of my grandma's life were much harder and more difficult than you'd want for anyone so memories are good to have. When I was five months pregnant with Molly, Grandma drove here from the city and stayed with me. I can still remember seeing her kneeling out behind our garage transplanting some rhubarb she brought me. I don't really care for rhubarb, but it's still there. If we ever move, it'll come with me. After we got done planting we went into my kitchen and sat at the old yellow table we had then and had coffee and something tea-ish to eat.

I ache to do that again.

I believe we will again one day very soon, because Grandma loved the Lord and trusted in Jesus for her salvation as I do. I'll always remember her most like this, with her Bible in her lap.

Gran with her Bible 

3 comments:

  1. Wow! What a beautiful tribute to a very special lady from a very special lady!!

    Ya know, Pam... I just sent you an email and then popped over here and I feel even more "kindred" with you now having read this. A) I too am one of 6 kids... where are you? I'm "baby". B) My grandma was extremely special to me too and your description of your precious Granny made me remember my special memories of mine. We had the privilege of growing up next door to my grandparents and that was a treat I will forever be grateful for my parents for choosing to do. When both my grandparents died (Grandpa in 1988/Grandma in 1999) they left a huge gaping hole in my heart as well. A lot of days while walking past their pictures I'll say a "hello" to them as a wonderful memory pops into my head. (Do the same for Mom now too).

    Didn't mean to ramble but I just LOVED your post today!! I pray God's comfort and joy flood over you as you sift through these memories and pics!!

    Big big hugs xo

    ReplyDelete
  2. Just a wonderful tribute to your grandma. I was lucky to be close to bothmy grandmas. You had so many great adventures with her, God bless those memories. Hugs

    ReplyDelete
  3. This is beautiful Pam, I had closeness with both of my grandmas and I miss them so much. I should write about them. Thank you for sharing your heart.
    HUGS

    ReplyDelete